


I'm free but I'm flawed

by bestaceinspace



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-19
Updated: 2015-10-19
Packaged: 2018-04-27 01:19:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5028145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bestaceinspace/pseuds/bestaceinspace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You are afraid he doesn't see how incredible he is. Maybe it's because he thinks he can't offer you enough, but you tell him he is already everything. Slowly he begins to see it. That it doesn't matter what, you are there for him. He is more than you could ever put into words.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm free but I'm flawed

These are pieces of writing that I did while making this [playlist](http://8tracks.com/anaslostwings/i-am-free-but-i-am-flawed-makoharu). Somehow it all became a fanfiction. Sort of. Well...

 

* * *

 

_“You are enough; these little words, somehow they’re changing us; you are enough; so we let our shadows fall away like dust”_ (You are enough – Sleeping at last)

You are afraid he doesn't see how incredible he is. Maybe it's because he thinks he can't offer you enough, but you tell him he is already everything. Slowly he begins to see it. That it doesn't matter what, you are there for him. He is more than you could ever put into words.

.

_“You said I'm young, but I'm yours; I am free, but I am flawed; I'm here in your heart; I was here from the start”_ (Box of stones – Benjamin Francis Leftwitch)

Somehow you know your heart has always been there next to him. Your roots are tied to his feet. If he moves, you try to follow, and together you share the synchronized beating of your hearts. It feels like a dream when it starts. It's like the ocean, calm and agitated at the same time, but you both jump in.

.

_“Then looking upwards I strain my eyes and try to tell the difference between shooting stars and satellites.”_ (Passenger seat – Death cab for cutie)

He kisses you almost timidly, hands shaking on your face and it is like fireworks explode inside your chest. Except this time you don't feel the urge to cry. You remember, sometime before, when you never thought it would happen. Not like this. And it's the long walks you take together, fingers laced, warm faces that make you realize maybe it was always supposed to be like this.

.

_“And no man is an island, oh this I know; but can't you see, oh; maybe you were the ocean when I was just a stone”_ (Black flies – Ben Howard)

Sometimes he looks at the water like he will sail away from you; like he isn't there at all and it's scary. Maybe someday he might go where you can't follow. Maybe he doesn't want to stay where he is. Maybe you are the rock tying him to the shore. What if he finds a dream and you are not part of it? What if he decides to leave? Will it be better if you let him go? You won’t hold him back or stay in the way.

.

_“And I told you to be patient; and I told you to be fine; and I told you to be balanced; and I told you to be kind; and now all your love is wasted? And then who the hell was I?”_ (Skinny love – Bon Iver)

Who are you compared to a person like him? You ask yourself. ‘What does he see when he looks at me?’ You are patience and kindness in every word. Someone he can count on. But will it last? You don't know. Or will it fall short, sink in the sea? Who would you ever be without him? Will he always need you, in the end, or will he find himself in someone other than you?

.

_“Come if you believe me; come if you remember the way; if not then I will find you this time; wishing you had stayed”_ (Wants what it wants – Andrew Belle)

You have no escape from a fate you always accepted anyway, but you have dreams of your own even though you would never want to leave him behind. Why do people need to grow up when it means growing apart from people that matter the most? Your heart wants to follow a path, but not without him. You want him before anything else. He looks at you and smiles and maybe you think he will accept it this time and he will stay; you two belonging to where you have always been: next to each other.

.

_“It isn’t much but it's a start; you got me swaying right along to the song in your heart; and a face to call home; a face to call home; you got a face to call home”_ (A face to call home – John Mayer)

You kiss him with trembling hands as well, and he easily melts into you. He trusts you completely. It’s like you two are dancing together to the same quiet song, matching like you always were supposed to fit, moving as one. You knew you both could make it work. Slowly it feels like it has always been like this: touching, kissing and loving; the most natural thing. He asks you to stay this time, and you say ‘yes’ and ‘you don’t have to feel alone’.

.

_“I’ll keep you safe; try hard to concentrate; hold out your hand; Can you feel the weight of it? The whole world at your fingertips; don’t be, don’t be afraid; our mistakes, they were bound to be made but I promise you I’ll keep you safe”_ (I’ll keep you safe – Sleeping at last)

You will do anything to keep what you have always safe but also let him be free. God knows you two are still afraid of the future, what you will do with the dreams you have chosen. But it doesn’t matter if, in the end, both your paths will cross. You will see each other again. You both will be safe; whatever it is supposed to come your way. Growing old doesn’t have to mean growing apart. You will still stand out your hand to him and he will take it, as you take his heart in your hands and stay.


End file.
